Cotton Wool

Yes I think that's what I've been wrapped in the past 6 weeks. I think sadly I'm still reeling from recent events but it occurred to me tonight that the impact is too great and the person isn't worthy of the disarray they have caused to my life. After so many years of supporting and encouraging someone - finding you have been virtually cut out of the picture because obviously you aren't part of the "in" crowd is somewhat cutting. Loyalty clearly isn't worth a cracker these days which came as a bit of a surprise to old fashioned me.

So I need to put it all into perspective, understand that clearly my loyalty and support and friendship was extremely misguided and move on. It's been 6 weeks since I've ventured into my scrapbooking room. I'm in there tonight and I have to tell you it feels weird and I had absolutely no scrapbooking incentive, I haven't created a card, I didn't enter this year's Royal Melbourne Show and to be frank I would struggle even to work on Lakeisha's 21st invitations at this point.

I'd really like to thank the instigator of this. I mean in 35 years of showing dogs amongst some of the bitchiest people I've ever had the misfortune of spending time with - nothing quite came up to the disappointment of this and yet I find myself shaking my head as to why I've allowed it to affect me as much as it has. Even right now as I type this I wonder if its worth the 5 minutes of my life to type it. But it did happen and I AM hurt and acknowledgement of the fact seems only right given I've blogged about all the other ugly things in my life.

But in the meantime I've celebrated my 50th birthday, I still have the most adorable daughter in the world and the most enviable partner. We do live with the worlds most annoying dog - but we still love her. And if nothing else over the past 24 hours - I have realised that friendship is only as good as the friendship returned and at the end of the day if the loyalty and support returned counts for ZIP then you haven't really lost a whole bunch in the end anyway.....